Charles Krauthammer, the Harvard-educated psychiatrist has recently discovered a mental condition, called Bush Derangement Syndrome.
Essentially, the patient strongly dislikes everything a person known as W does or does not even if this person just feeds his dog, sharpens his pencils, or waters his bushes. Victims of the syndrome easily go off balance, rambling, fuming, foaming, trembling, shaking, epilepsy, apoplexy, apoptosis (cells decide to shut down).
Now, scientists have finally found what lurks behind this remarkable human condition.
Microbiologists have found two new bacteria throughout the US and elsewhere.
Two new bacteria species were isolated throughout the US and elsewhere, Staphylococcus bushiderangis and Staphylocheneys oilisyndromis
The latter was found also near oil wells, and turned out to be even a more pathogenic one. It causes an acute mental disorder, known as Cheney-Induced Apoplexy.
Particularly susceptible to the two microorganisms are:
disgruntled existentialists, ever-murmuring socialists, raging pacifists, gas-guzzling environmentalists,
two-dimensional-cerebrum celebrities, and a rambling mini-Godzilla, seen recently on the ABC’s hit show “The View”
It was found in particularly high concentrations in the LA Malibu area, David Geffen’s 1-bedroom rented condo,
Ben Affleck’s teenage retainer and George Clooney’s movie script of Ocean 47.
Almost lethal concentrations were detected in :
the San Francisco bay area, Jane Fonda’s dark-green lip-stick, Susan Sarandon’s yellow-colored eye lenses,
and Nancy Pelosi eyelashes.
The Speaker’s doctor grumbled out the following:
Now we know how the world record of 3 million blinks per minute became possible.
A speaker for the madam speaker, however gave our reporter another interpretation:
”Miss Nancy Pelosi is very proud to be the first woman speaker in the history of the US.
As such, Madame Speaker was able to blink with the speed of light for 54 minutes as Mr. Albert Einstein famously predicted in his special relativity equation E = mc2
Lethal doses of Staphylococcus bushiderangis were detected :
In Michael Moore’s night pot and mobile colonoscopy package,
and on Alec Baldwin’s one way ticket to or North Korea.
Mr. Baldwin’s reaction was as follows:
If George Bush is elected for president again in 2008, I’m really moving to North Korea, this time, I promise.
Another very resilient bacteria seemed to have been growing on Mr. Baldwin’s speakerphone, however. Scientists found it to be a strain of Streptodaughters straightenupsis.
Mr. Baldwin’s comments on the discovery were as follows:
“I wondered why the handset smelled so funny.” I’m gonna straighten up this little piggy phone.
When Michael Moore was told the news, he slapped his forehead and exclaimed:
"Eureka, now, I see where the idea about my last documentary came from!"
Staphylocheneys oilisyndromis was found in very high concentrations in:
Keith Olbermann’s mouthwash, Phil Donahue’s senility medication, Charlie Sheen’s emperor-sized sheets.
Charlie Sheen’s comment on this: I knew some of these girls will finally give me into something nasty.
The bacteria appeared to have grown really well on Sean Penn’s moustache, Barbara Boxer’s eyelash extensions,
and Barbra Streisand’s make-up kit.
The great Barbra admitted: Now I know why I’m losing my meeeemooory.
It was found also in every wrinkle of Robert Redford’s face, Mat Damon’s nostrils and
John Edward’s $2,000 worth hair shampoo.
It turned out that Mr. Edwards had known about the cheneysyndromis bacteria all along.
Grinning innocently, he explained: “What do you think makes my hair extensions so perky and boyish, people?
The highest concentration, however, was detected in a tank of valium, hidden in one of Rosie O’Donnell’s closets.
While hanging in her favorite upside down position, Ms. O’Donnell was kind to share with our reporter the following:
It’s as tasty as a Big Mac. “I’m lovin’ it.
This thing changes me completely. I’m onto men again.
This Hugo Chavez is such a hot anti-Bushante.
And Mahmunejad is gonna get Cheney by the …….(beep beep).
And Kim-Jong-il , mmmm, yummy.
The hottest trail turned out to lead to a remote property of Hungarian-born billionaire, George Soros.
We were lucky to interview Mr. Soros right in front of one of his estates.
“We are not confirming or denying what we’re producing here, in out labs, except for, that it is working like a charm.” Move on, comrades!
Russia – The Mother Of All Pathologies
While the Soviet union is formally long gone, very little hassince then changed in Russia for the better. Communism in its old, ideologically senile form might not be there, but the pathology remains. Here are some facts:
- In 2007 average life expectancy in Russia is as follows:
73 years - females
59 years - for males !!!
Which modern and civilized country throughout the world has 59 years male life expectancy?
There is hardly anybody (knowing something about Russia), who doesn’t know the reasons for this – Russian men simply drown themselves in alcohol, sometimes not even ethanol but a home-made mixture. Out of desperation.
In the Russian town of Dzerzhinsk, (a centre of Soviet chemical warfare production) the life expectancy is 47 (women) and 42 (men). It seems like the current Russian regime couldn't care less about this.
- The Russian population shrinks downs by about 1 mln. each year although there is tremendous immigration from former Soviet republics, where the situation is even more desperate.
- Many young Russian women are desperate in their wish to find somebody and get married from abroad, just to get away from the madhouse.
- The AIDS situation in Russia is as bad as in Africa.
According to this Reuters source:
http://www.rense.com/general20/scarier.htm
“AIDS is soon to ravage Russia with consequences that may be even more catastrophic than in Africa, yet the public is barely even aware the epidemic has arrived, Russia's top AIDS official said.”
Unlike Africa however, the Russian political elite pretends their country to be a major world player, they are proud to be a G-8 member, their diminished status is seen just as a temporary event.
At the same time Russia has vast resources. It is the biggest producer of natural gas and second in oil. Russia has other resources, such as metals, diamonds, gold. All those, however, are totally controlled by the regime in order to pursue their malignant agenda of reviving totalitarian, or at best, authoritarian Russia as a major world player.
5. Desperate to counter US world influence, Russia supports and arms many despotic, rogue regimes throughout the world, including:
China, Iran,
The soaked in blood regime of Saddam Hussein in Iraq in the past
The soaked in blood regime of Slobodan Milosevic in former Yugoslavie and later Serbia in the past.
Milosevic was a Moscow puppet all along. The Russians threatened to veto NATO military action in Kosovo in 1999 (and against Milosevic). The US/NATO forces had to launch their operation to protect Kosovo from ethnic cleansing without UN approval as a result of this.
North Korea Syria, Belarus
The Russian regime is/was in close military and intelligence cooperation with all these despotic regimes. For example they provided valuable intelligence to the Saddam regime up to his removal in 2003.
As a permanent, veto-holding member of the UN Security Council, Russia tried to counter any serious pressure, exerted by the West in its attempt to uphold the UN principles and democratize the above mentioned countries (minus China which is a UNSC permanent member as well and can block anything they don’t particularly like themselves)
- The Russian state machine, the amalgam of the Russian secret services and the Russian mafia (created, controlled and operated by the Russian secret services), got involved in numerous murders of non-conformist journalists, activists, and foreign citizens, among others after 1991. (Link)
http://www.rferl.org/featuresarticle/2006/10/d3f96c9f-196e-4936-81b1-3b27e186d283.html
The old mechanisms of repression, utilized by the Soviet meat-grinder were replaced with a system of “contract” killings, controlling and looting the country of its resources and overwhelming and ultra-corrupt state bureaucracy and judicial system. The semi-free (at best) Russian media was again taken back under a very tight, almost official control, as in the past.
The thuggish, repressive component of the Soviet KGB and the judiciary was replaced by the Russian mafia, which had been created and controlled by the Soviet state machine.
Essential for this transformation was the release from jail of hundreds of thousands of criminals, most of which were informants of the KGB even prior to joining the Russian mafia. AS a rule, Soviet jails and concentration campshad a deputy commander who was a KGB officer, running a vast agents' network inside the convicts.
Freed (amnestied) in the 80s under Gorbachev, these criminalsy, together with their secret services runners made up what is now known as the Russian mafia.
Their current president, Putin, was previously deputy mayor of St. Ptersburg, responsible for the exports of resources (metals, oil, etc.), i.e., an essential element of the flight capital operations. Flight capital during the 90s was one of the highest prioroties of the Soviet/later Russian regime.
Without caring about financing the ongoing and thriving Russian pathology, some corporations, such as the BP and Shell invested billions in modernizing the Russian oil and gas crumbling infrastructure. Before Russia showed any genuine signs of breaking with the passt.
Duped by the prospective of profiting from the vast Russian resources, such companies pumped into the malignant Russian state machine billions of litres of fresh blood, reviving its oil and gas industry, thus reviving its potential to be again a major troublemaker.
To be continued
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